NoirBlanc
by Brandon the Scrivener
Summary: Black and white. Two things as different as night and day, right and wrong. But here, nothing is certain. In this shady world of detective noir, Eddy McGee must delve into a city's darkside to save his friend in this tale of mystery, deception, lust, and murder.
1. Chapter 1: The Grey City

**Noir/Blanc**

 _ **Demeter's Harbor, USA**_

 _ **June 17**_ _ **th**_ _ **, 1951**_

 _ **5:00 PM**_

An apprehensive middle aged woman approached the apartment briskly. She was a dignified woman, clearly of means. She had the smell of old money about her and the demeanor of someone who knew it. She seemed troubled. And why shouldn't she be? In the metropolis of Demeter's Harbor, trouble abounds…

 **In the Apartment**

Eddy Skipper McGee stirred beneath his sheets, the muggy June heat finally getting to him. His black crop hair plastered to the back of his head by sheer perspiration. A desk fan oscillated across the room, working overtime. His dark blue eyes adjusted to the semi-darkness. He looked to his left to see Lee Kanker, as bare as the day she was born, standing by the apartment window and smoking one of Eddy's cigarettes. He was able to deduce they were his because the pack was almost completely empty, save for one cigarette. Eddy shook his head and got out of bed and began to dress. After pulling on his red-striped boxers and undershirt, he went to claim his last cigarette.

"You gonna pay me for the new pack?" he asked, lighting up his last cigarette. She grinned haughtily and said, "I thought I already did." She gave him a smug look and he couldn't help but grin. Lee was a tall drink of water (about 6'0, dwarfing poor Eddy's 5'7). She had lovely curly red hair done up in a bouffant (though right now it was a little disheveled, much to Eddy's secret delight). _She's lovely all over_ , Eddy thought as he looked her up and down. Granted, most men would have thought her too plain, too common; a bit too masculine. Lee reminded Eddy of Rosie the Riveter: sexy, but also the type of dame who could drink you under the table. But that was more than okay with Eddy.

He went into the kitchen to get a cold pop from the icebox; a Lemonbrook Lemon-Twist, a local brand. After he removed the cap, he took a long swig of his cool, liquid salvation. He met her eyes again, those smoky grey eyes, and said with a smirk, "Put some clothes on for Pete's sake. I got neighbors" She just smirked and said nonchalantly, "Let'em look. You don't seem to mind." He just grinned and took another drink.

A moment later she said, "Hey, some dame's coming up to your apartment." She stepped aside so he could look out his window. It took Eddy a moment to recognize the woman before it dawned on him. "Get dressed." He walked over and started buttoning his signature yellow bowling-shirt and pulling on his trousers. A moment later, there was a knock at the door.

Eddy opened the door quickly. The he and the woman held each other's gaze for a bit before she asked, "Well? Do intend to invite me in, Edward?" He nodded and let her in. She surveyed the apartment with a look of distaste, every glance critiquing his disorganized living room, dirty kitchen, and the pin-ups on the wall. At last she finally said, "You have a very… quaint home, Edward." Standing there in the middle of the room awkwardly, Eddy replied, "Thanks Mrs. LaCroix." After a long moment, he finally spoke up. "So, Mrs. LaCroix... What are you doing in my neck of the woods? Something to do with Double D, am I right?"

She looked as though she was about to correct him, when suddenly she broke down into tears. Eddy just stood there, giving Lee a befuddled look. Lee, after giving Eddy a frustrated look, brought Mrs. LaCroix a coffee. "Here you go, hon." Mrs. LaCroix, her face screwed up in tears, accepted the coffee and attempted to thank Lee. "Why…thank you…um…" After an awkward moment of pondering, Lee (with some annoyance) responded, "Lee." She then went back to the kitchen.

After taking a moment to collect herself, Mrs. LaCroix turned to Eddy and said, "Since you must ask, I'll take that to mean that you haven't seen today's paper?" Eddy, awkwardly, responded, "No, I've been in bed all day." She then proceeded to pass him the newspaper. What Eddy saw slapped across the front page nearly knocked the wind out of him.

 **Prominent Professor Murders Wife!**

 **Professor Eddward LaCroix Arrested in the Murder of Nazz Van Bartonschmeer**

Eddy, dumbfounded, turned to Double D's mother and asked with great difficulty, "When…when did this happen?" "The police found her last night, in the dressing room of her workplace. They…arrested my poor Edward this morning." she said, tearing up again. "I came to you, Mr. McGee, in the hope that you would help my son. I know it's been some years, but I always remembered how close you boys were. So please, will you? I'll do whatever you ask, pay any price!"

Eddy was unsure how to respond. _I can't get involved in this. Not when it's too personal._ _ **I can't get involved.**_ After a moment of pondering, Eddy finally spoke. "I'll look into it. For old time's sake." She thanked him profusely, as Eddy hurried her out the door. After she was gone, Lee attempted to console Eddy. Before she could finish, Eddy stormed out of the apartment and got into his car and drove off, towards the city. The city were trouble is aplenty and where the line between right and wrong becomes grey.


	2. Chapter 2: At the Gates

**Noir/Blanc**

I Do Not Own Ed, Edd, n Eddy. However, I retain all rights to OCs.

 **The Antonucci Highway**

 **June 17, 1951**

 **5:40 PM**

Eddy cruised down the Antonucci Highway in his '49 Ford Shoebox Convertible, a cigarette between his lips, reminiscing about his childhood. The Cul-De-Sac. It had once been his entire world as a kid. He and his two best friends (and as he was later able to come to terms with, his only friends): Ed Horace White and Edd "Double D" Marion LaCroix. They had been as close as brothers throughout their whole childhood and had grown even closer when they confronted Eddy's deadbeat, asshole brother one summer.

But then the Japs dropped the bombs on Pearl Harbor in '41. Most of the Cul-De-Sac boys were of age at the time and, like most Americans, were eager to fight. Eddy, with no real talent for school and no prospects, got swept up in the madness and enlisted alongside the Big Lug (as he liked to call Ed). All the boys did, with the exception of two: Jonny and Double D. Jonny had fallen in with a rough crowd not long after that summer the kids had confronted Eddy's brother and everyone lost contact with him. That was over ten years ago. Double D, on the other hand, had tried everything to enlist, but no one would accept him on account of his inability to pass basic physicals. So he stayed behind, begrudgingly, and helped with the war effort and Ed and Eddy ended up in the Pacific (which sure as hell was no picnic like they thought).

They all made it home eventually and Eddy had even gotten a couple medals for bravery out of it. But they came home to find Demeter's Harbor was a very different place. So with no prospects or any real qualifications, both Eds joined the police department, which was where many returning veterans went. They worked hard and within a year were off the street and after three more years, they both made detective and were partnered up in Vice. And then everything went to shit.

Almost two years ago, Eddy was booted out of the police and almost brought up on charges but "luckily" for Eddy, the charges were dropped. He was out of a job and Ed was assigned a new partner. Out of work and only having one skill-set, Eddy became a private detective. It was far-cry from Vice Detective, but it put money in his pocket but also anger in his heart.

Also around this time, a more joyous occurrence took place. Double D and Nazz Van Bartonschmeer, another girl from the old neighborhood, got married. At one time or another, every boy in the Cul-De-Sac had been in love with her but while most moved on, Eddy and Double D never did. Eventually though, Eddy went off to fight and Double D stayed behind. Pretty soon, one thing led to another and Nazz and Double D wound up together. And Eddy didn't protest. He was happy for them both. Nazz was a beautiful, kind, thoughtful, intelligent girl and Double D definitely deserved to be happy.

But still, a part of Eddy just couldn't let go so easily. Sure, he stood as Double D's best man and gave a speech at the reception. They were still best friends after all. But time passed and eventually all three Eds drifted apart. Since then, Eddy hadn't spoken to either Ed. But now, circumstances had thrown them back together one last time.

Eddy finally approached the Lemonbrook County Jail (where Double D was being held). He parked his car and waited outside, unable to go in right away. He stood there a few minutes, smoking, and watching the sunset against the city backdrop. Then he squared himself up, stubbed his last cigarette, and walked towards the jail. It loomed dark and foreboding over him. For some reason, he suddenly remembered a line Double D had recited in high school when they were partnered in English together. He muttered it under his breath, "Abandon all hope, ye who enter here…"


	3. Chapter 3: Old Friends

**Noir/Blanc**

I Do Not Own Ed, Edd, n Eddy. However, I retain all rights to OCs.

 **Lemonbrook County Jail**

 **June 17, 1951**

 **6:22 PM**

Eddy sat at the small metal table in the Visitation Area, drumming his thumbs nervously. The room was very cold. Plain stone tile floor and whitewash walls gave the place a feeling of authority. After a few minutes of waiting, the heavy metal door to his left groaned open. Out first came Double D, wearing a very uncharacteristic uniform of denim jeans and a blue-grey collared shirt with a number on the front. This seemed even more ridiculous given how they hung from his slim build and how well manicured his black hair was, parted and combed well. Behind Double D, following suit came the guard. He was an old timer with white hair and a bushy mustache; a real good ol' boy type. They stopped at the opposite end of the table were Double D was seated (after courteously thanking the guard, as was his habit). The guard turned to Eddy and said, "Twenty minutes. Not a minute more."

Eddy nodded to show his understanding and slid the guard a ten before he left. He then, at last (with some hesitation) turned to meet Double Ds gaze. Double D, upon closer inspection, seemed very fatigued and had bags under his bloodshot teal eyes, which normally shone clear and full of knowledge and warmth, but now seemed utterly empty. Still, he somehow managed to fake a smile and said in a hoarse but affectionate voice, "You're certainly looking well, Eddy." He looked and sounded as though he was sixty-eight, instead of twenty-eight.

"Wish I could say the same about you" he said attempting to sound jocular, but instead sounding a bit cruel. They both were silent for a moment before Eddy spoke again, "I'm sorry about Nazz, Double D."

Double D, it seemed was trying to make some effort to thank Eddy, but couldn't bring himself to speak; instead breaking down into tears. Eddy paused a moment before reaching over and clasping Double D's arm in reassurance. Eddy spoke again, "So what happened, Double D? I know it couldn't have been you, but you gotta know something."

Double D collected himself before finally being able to speak up. "It was just like any other evening, really. I was preoccupied with planning my next lesson when she kissed me goodbye and set off for work. She didn't return when she said she would, but I thought nothing of it. She often comes home very late." He paused a moment and looked Eddy squarely in the eye before continuing, "I did not worry because I trust my wife. So I went to bed without her. In the early morning, I was awoken by the police. They then promptly arrested me, despite my contestation."

He finished and just stared at Eddy, waiting for him to speak. Eddy saw he didn't have much time left, so he spoke quickly "Double D, do you have any other information you could give me? Any…ideas as to who might have wanted to do Nazz harm?" He stopped there, knowing that he wasn't going to get any farther.

Double D just shook his head and said sadly, "Come now Eddy. You and Nazz weren't strangers. Who do you think would want to harm her?" With that, the door groaned again, marking the end of their visitation. Double D turned back to Eddy and said, "Please Eddy, figure this out. If not for my sake, then for _hers._ " He attempted one weak smile. "It's good to see you again, Eddy. Even if the circumstances aren't really ideal…" Double D bid Eddy farewell before being led off. Eddy sat there for a moment, his insides all knotted up. "Alright," Eddy said to himself. Eddy then walked out of the jail and into the dying evening light.


	4. Chapter 4: Behind the Veil

**Noir/Blanc**

I Do Not Own Ed, Edd, n Eddy. However, I retain all rights to OCs. Italics represent thoughts and internal monologue.

 **The Eros Club**

 **June 17, 1951**

 **7:45 PM**

Eddy turned down Sampson Avenue and parked near the Eros Club. The Eros Club was, on the surface, just a regular entertainment club. A dance hall, bar, and a stage where local talent performed. Many young women came; wide-eyed innocents who dreamed of breaking into the pictures (or at very least, Broadway). But like anything, there was a flipside to the Eros Club.

Eddy knew from his time on the force that the Eros Club was a police sanctioned brothel. Half of the young women in there had jackets for prostitution. So while Average Joe and his girl drank and danced, the most powerful members of Demeter's Bay's social elite were screwing high-class tail right behind their backs. Many powerful men frequented the club: judges, politicians, business men, and cops. Eddy knew for a fact that the Chief of Police was one of the club's best customers. So when Eddy saw the black and whites lined up in front of the club, he knew that things would be especially tense.

Eddy walked towards luminescent entrance of the club and was draped in white neon light from the sign above. The sign was designed simply: the neon bulbs contorted in a sexy cursive scrawl that read "The Eros Club" and ended with an arrow-pierced heart. He slipped past the men at the entrance, noticing a lack of reporters, (which must have been no easy feat to ensure) and had just made it in when he was stopped by a young Hispanic man in blues. "Sorry sir, no admittances. The club is closed till further notice." He then stopped abruptly and, after a moment of pondering, said "Aren't you Eddy McGee? You used to work Vice, right?"

Eddy put on his best faux-charming grin. "That's right. You're Ramirez, right? Paolo Ramirez? You were just starting out when I left the Department." The kid was probably only nineteen, maybe twenty at most. He was clean shaven with a fresh-out-of-the-academy-buzz-cut and with his blues on (stupid hat and all), looked like he was ready to invade Poland. He seemed like a good kid though. Eddy remembered how Ramirez had gotten a lot of shit from the old timers on the Department since he was a Mex. But Eddy never care. _He's honest, willing to bust his ass and is one heck of a shot. As for being a Mexican, I got nothing against a people who invented tequila. Viva la Mexico!_

Ramirez nodded. "You really shouldn't be here Eddy. Shits really hitting the fan in there."

"I understand. But listen Ramirez, I knew the vic. She and I were very close. All I want to do is take a look. What do you say?" Eddy prayed that the kid was still guilible enough to believe him.

Ramirez, after a moment, relented and lifted the crime scene tape. Eddy grinned and stepped under and headed into the club.

Eddy took note of everything he saw: Cops huddled in little clusters all over the place, talking in hushed voices. Several good-looking girls corralled into one corner of the room being interviewed by some Homicide dick who was clearly getting nowhere if his expression was to be believed. Heavy traffic in the back of the place, where he saw Tech guys coming and going. Noting this, Eddy headed there.

He saw that the Tech guys were going into a dressing room down a narrow hallway backstage. Eddy slid in behind some oblivious Tech guys. He saw that the room was your typical low-grade, wannabe dressing room. It was small and bare, with only a clothes rack with many assorted costumes and lewd garments and a cosmetics bureau stationed front and center of the room. He also took note of (with some churning of his stomach) the large, dried blood-spatter on the left wall and the small pool of semi-dried blood in the carpet, near the bureau. Evidence markers were layed out all over the room.

Eddy, unnoticed by the busy lab guys, surveyed the room. He approached the bureau and examined it. He knew that Nazz had been shot in the head, based by the spatter and the amount of it. However, he also noted that spatter was relatively small, as was the bullet hole in the wall. _Small caliber bullet_ , he thought, _done while she was sitting down and at very close range, judging by the trajectory. What else does that tell you, Eddy? She knew her shooter. No way for anybody to creep into this shithole, especially with the mirror facing the door. She knew him…and she was comfortable enough to being sitting with him in the room. Answer? She knew him well._

Eddy made his way over to the bullet hole, undeterred. _Small caliber bullet and nobody reported the sound of gunfire. Cover-up by the staff? No. Too much money on the line to risk a slew of Obstruction charges. They know to call the cops and play it by the book. The killer probably used a silencer. Silencer and small caliber gun: professional work. No Joe Schmo did this. So the real question is why would some heavy-duty badman want to kill Nazz?_

He continued to ponder and went back to the bureau to examine it. He saw a lot of cosmetics: lip rouge, eyeliner, and (what peeked his curiosity) a very small porcelain container of blush. _That's odd. Especially considering that she has a full sized container of blush already here._ He opened the blush container and saw a fine white powder. Cautiously, he took a finger and put in and tasted it.

Eddy's stomach lurched. He could recognize that taste anywhere. After all, he had tasted it on a regular basis for three years. _Heroin. A shitload of it too. And this isn't your regular, heavily diluted shit you buy on the corner, either. This as pure as it gets._ Eddy looked for a syringe or pipe but eventually found a very small metal spoon submerged in the heroin. _She snorted it._

Eddy, his worst fears confirmed, pocketed the dope when no one was looking. He stood there absent-mindedly, lost in thought. _So we have a beautiful young woman working at a police sanctioned brothel, a hitman, and enough pure H to give any two-bit hood a major hard on. This case just exploded._

Eddy, lost in thought didn't notice two men approaching him. "Hey! The fuck are you doing in here?" Eddy snapped back to reality and recognized two unhappy faces. One was Detective Sergeant Kevin Shaw of Ad Vice and his dickhead partner, Leland "Kirk" Kirkland, Kevin's thickheaded lackey.

Kevin, right around the time the other boys had returned from the war, had joined the DBPD. It was rumored that before that, he had been in the Army but was dishonorably discharged in '44 for reasons unknown (at least that was the rumor). He was now second in command of Ad Vice and number one lackey for his crooked boss. The man who ran it all: Chief Detective Declan O'Rourke. Together, the two of them controlled every crooked angle of the Department. Graft, prostitution, shakedowns, pornography, and everything in-between. Except for dope. The mob were the only licensed dope dealers in the city.

Eddy sneered, "What are you doing here, Shovelchin? This is a Homicide. No reason for Vice to be here. So what's up?"

Kevin gave Eddy a haughty look. He had his ginger hair razor-cut and his eyes were green and beady. He wore a brown sports coat over a white collared shirt and his Colt 1911. He smelled of cheap cologne and even cheaper liquor. "Take a look at where you are at, Shorty. A brothel. That makes this a Vice case too. Plus, we have reason to believe that the vic-" he trailed off, a slightly forlorn look crossing his face before he continued, "Nazz… was killed for reasons relating to matters that concern Ad Vice. More importantly, what the fuck are you doing here, Mr. Ex-cop?"

Kirk spoke up, "My guess is that dumb spic working the door let him in. Fucking moron." Kirk looked like a gorilla dressed to imitate Kevin. He was 6'1, 200 something pounds of brawn, and had his blonde hair cut the exact way as Kevin's. His eyes were light blue and seemed to lack even the smallest spark of intelligence. His wardrobe seemed to confirm this, too. He had a drab tan sports coat on over a dingey white collared shirt and some really gaudy zoot suit chic French-style shoes that looked moronic on him.

Kirk chuckled at his own stupid remark and Kevin just smirked before yelling, "Ramirez, get in here now!"

Paolo came into the room, looking a bit uncomfortable but attempting to put on a brave face. "Yes, Detective?"

Kevin pointed to Eddy and said, "Ramirez, in the future please don't let degenerate, crooked ex-cops onto my crime scene. Think you can manage that?" At the word crooked, Ramirez looked to Eddy, as though for confirmation. Eddy simply looked away and gritted his teeth.

Eddy made a move to leave before Kevin extended a hand to stop him and said in a low, menacing voice, "Do everyone, including yourself, a favor: stay away from this case. I'm only gonna warn you once, for Nazz's sake. Now get the fuck outta my crime scene."

Eddy barged out angrily and got in his car. He didn't leave immediately though. He sat for a long while looking at the almost blinding whit neon sign. The Eros Club: where all your dreams come true. _And even sometimes your nightmares._


	5. Chapter 5: Innocence Lost

**Noir/Blanc**

I Do Not Own Ed, Edd, n Eddy. However, I retain all rights to OCs. Italics represent thoughts and internal monologue.

 **DBPD Mortuary**

 **June 17, 1951**

 **9:00 PM**

Eddy descended into the bowels of the Demeter Bay Police Department (he still had _some_ friends on the force who we're willing to sneak him in), proceeding down the stairs and then the elevated ramp down to the coroner's office. His stomach still churned at the smell of chemicals and his palms were sweaty from a mixture of anxiety and frustration, despite how cool it was in the morgue. He hesitated a moment before approaching a bookish young man in his early twenties with red hair, glasses and a lab coat. "You the guy I spoke to on the phone?" Eddy inquired.

The young man nodded nervously. "Yeah, so listen: the coroner has got a lot of paperwork to do, so he is pulling an all-nighter and went to get some chow at the diner down the street. That was about fifteen ago, so you only have about ten minutes, alright?" He was very anxious, his fingers drumming against the clipboard pressed so hard to his chest, Eddy thought he might impale himself on it. _I seen a few Japs commit seppuku during the war, kid. I don't think it is a very pleasant experience, especially with a clipboard._

"Don't worry. I'll be in and out in no time" Eddy reassured with as pleasant a smile he could muster at the time being. The Coroner's Assistant led Eddy into the Examination Room. The tables were empty with the exception of the one that was farthest from the door. The body lying on the slab was covered with a freshly laundered white autopsy sheet, with the bright white florescent bulbs beaming down from above, giving it an almost heavenly atmosphere. Eddy held his breath, knowing what lay underneath that sheet. He stood there, frozen for a solid minute before he heard someone's voice.

"Detective? About that twenty…" the Coroner's Assistant asked hesitantly. Absentmindedly, Eddy handed him a twenty dollar bill and made his way over to the table with the Assistant started smoking. He offered one to Eddy. "You hear about the game?" he asked, trying to make small talk.

"No" Eddy said abruptly, promptly ending the conversation but still taking the cig without making eye contact and tucking it behind his right ear. Eddy hesitated and pulled back the sheet. Nazz, even as a corpse, was still beautiful. Her blonde hair still had a soft, silky look to it, her skin was flawless (minus the gunshot wound to the back of the head), and she still possessed the remnants of what had once been charm. Eddy only pulled the sheet down far enough to cover her breasts. _Godamnit…_ Eddy collected himself and went to work.

 _Small entry and exit wound to the back of the head and temple. Close range, small caliber bullet. No powder burns except for around the point of entry, so the killer must have put the gun directly to her head. That would explain some of the singed hair,_ he thought as he ran it between his fingers.

He examined the greater extent of her body, looking for any other markings but found nothing. He turned to the Assistant and asked, "What can you tell me in regards to intercourse?"

"We examined her, yes. She wasn't pregnant and, based on the dilation of the muscular vaginal walls, she'd had intercourse within the last twenty-four hours prior to death, but no traces of semen were collected. Besides that, we found nothing abnormal" he said, smoking and looking about nervously.

Eddy nodded. "What time do you place the time of death?" The Assistant picked up his nearby clipboard and studied it a moment.

"Based on the internal temperature measured at the crime scene, the Coroner places her death at around 10:00 PM. You also might be interested to know that the toxicology report showed a large amount of alcohol and opiates were found in her system."

Eddy continued and headed over to two boxes of evidence that were nearby that had been labeled Van Bartonschmeer. One contained the clothes Nazz had been wearing at the time of her death and the other was items found on her person at the time of death. Eddy took out the slinky, short black dress that Nazz had been wearing (which was now stained in blood). _This isn't like her at all. Nazz liked to look sexy, but she never had to show off this much skin to get a guy's attention._ Eddy then found a pair of lacey and sheer black panties. _**Most definitely**_ _not her._ He gave Nazz a sad look. "What the hell did they do to you, Nazz?" he asked in a low voice.

He then went on to look at her possessions. Her wedding ring was there (modest and charming, as was Double D's way; none the less, she treasured it and never took it off), a necklace given to her by her mother many years ago, and then, much to Eddy's confusion, he found an ornate black hair barrette with a blackbird on it. _I've never once seen this before. It's too new to be some old heirloom and too expensive for her salary (whatever the hell that was_ ), _so where did she get it?_ "

The Assistant was getting nervous now. "Alright, times up! You gotta go!"

Eddy ignored him. "Has all of this been catalogued?"

"No, not yet. Listen, you gotta go now. He'll be here in a minute!" Eddy stealthily stashed the beret in his pocket and left the morgue. _This case just gets stranger and stranger._ He got in his car and left the hospital, driving home and smoking the nicotine crutch the kid had gifted him. He finally reached his apartment at about 10:20 PM and was dead tired.

He trudged up the steps and saw through the window that all his lights were off, which was unusual. He fumbled with the keys and opened the door, cautiously stepping in. He had a bad feeling and he didn't know why. "Hello?" he asked the darkness. At that moment, a shadowy figure came up from behind him.


	6. Chapter 6: Reflection

**Noir/Blanc**

I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy. However, I retain all rights to OCs. _Italics_ represent thoughts and internal monologue.

 **Eddy's Apartment**

 **June 17, 1951**

 **10:20 PM**

Eddy spun around on the spot only to come face to face with Lee Kanker. She gave him an apologetic smile. "What's got you so jumpy, Manly?" she teased. He brushed her off with a smirk and sat down in his discount armchair.

"It's just this case. Lot of crazy shit…" he paused a moment reached into his pocket and produced the black barrette. "Say Lee… you're a woman aren't you?" he asked absentmindedly.

She snorted and gave him teasing look. "Well, I've been meaning to tell you something…" she grinned. "Yeah but I'd of thought you would have figured that out by now, Mr. Detective. Why do you ask?" She took a seat on the arm of the chair.

"I meant that need a woman's opinion" he said as he showed her the barrette. "This was on Nazz when they brought her in. What do ya say?" She took it in her hands and scrutinized every edge and curve of the barrette before speaking.

"Well, Edd definitely didn't get it for her" she said. Eddy was going to ask how she came to that conclusion but he reconsidered when he reminded himself of Double Dee's understanding of all things feminine and thus allowed her to proceed. "Pretty swanky. Definitely not something you wear out a lot. Must have cost a pretty penny." She handed it back to Eddy.

"Alright, so what does all that mean?" he asked. She rolled her eyes at him.

"Honestly… It means that she didn't get it from her husband obviously and it's too flashy to be a present from her parents. Which means she must have got it from an admirer. Somebody who she sees on a regular basis and someone who doesn't mind blowing that much green on one dinky little barrette. However, that shows us two more facts about this fella. And what might those two things be, Mr. McGee?" she asked hopefully.

Eddy had no choice but to shrug his shoulders and concede. When it came to dames, he was still learning. "I don't know Miss. What does it mean?"

Disappointed, Lee gave Eddy a serious look. "One: he's somewhere in the middle class bracket. If he was rich, he would have spent more on her gift and he wouldn't have been able to afford this little bauble if he was broke. Two: would you buy me anything this expensive if I didn't put out?"

Eddy couldn't help but grin sheepishly and say "Probably not." She smacked him over the head playfully.

"Exactly. So we know that, odds are, she was sleeping with this fella or he was at very least trying to convince her to do so" she sighed. "Typical men: always letting your willy tell you what to do."

Eddy chuckled, partially lost in his thoughts. He stared at the barrette for a bit before speaking. "When was the last time you visited May?" Lee stiffened at the question, the grin wiped from her face entirely.

"Not since Christmas" she replied.

Eddy nodded. "Get your things. We're going to pay a visit to a whorehouse."


	7. Chapter 7: Smokeless

**Noir/Blanc**

I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy. However, I retain all rights to OCs. _Italics_ represents thoughts and internal monologue.

 **The Antonucci Highway**

 **June 17, 1951**

 **11:33 PM**

Eddy and Lee cruised down the highway in Eddy's car. The city was in shadows and flickering glimmer fluorescent light. Most of the city's populace had settled in for the night so that they may face the blistering heat of the coming day. Eddy was simultaneously cruising and smoking a corkscrew-shaped, half spent cigarette he had pulled out of the car's ashtray. _Before this case is done, I'm going to have to buy some more fucking cigarettes._ He glanced over at Lee, who was looking out the window and absentmindedly fussing with her hair. In all the time that they had known each other, Eddy had only seen her do so on a few occasions. It was Lee's blatantly obvious tell: she was nervous about seeing her sister.

Eddy pulled into the Eros Club parking lot a few minutes later, after struggling to find a parking spot. He sat there with Lee in the car for a moment before speaking. "Alright, you go in first and find May. Talk to her and when you are finished, come find me. I'll be poking around and trying not to get the shit beat out of me" he grinned. Lee merely nodded and got out of the car. She made last minute alterations to her hair and her blouse before heading in.

Eddy waited for a few minutes before tossing his spent cig and heading in. The bouncer (or greeter, as Eros management preferred to call him) was noticeably absent when he walked in. _Whelp, looks like they know I'm here._ Eddy headed through the high archway that lead into the club. Without the droves of detectives and crime scene tape imposing on it, the Eros Club appeared much more jovial. Soft, warm artificial light kept the place just lit enough so you could see what you needed to see. The club's interior looked like the interior of a movie house: dark, carmine red walls, high ceilings and lots of fancy facets. There was a stage where the band would be seated or the dancers would tantalize and dance floor during the twilight hours that was currently covered by a large carpet so as to accommodate more tables near the stage.

The all black band was on stage playing a sanguine blues number (jazz and swing was reserved for early in the evening). Several cigarette girls were walking around the room hocking their wares. Eddy noticed most of the club's talent was out tonight, sitting with the patrons; teasing men old enough to be their fathers and pretending to be enraptured by heroic war stories that probably never happened. Eddy quickly spotted Lee and May sitting together at empty table in the back, chatting like you might expect two estranged sisters to do. _Good old May._

May had always had it the roughest of the three Kanker Sisters. In her youth, she had been the baby of the family (something that Eddy could unfortunately relate to). She had always been the least intelligent and the least pretty. However, she was still a decent girl. But it was her metamorphosis years later that had made Eddy actually consider the existence of a higher power. Post high school and after the trio split up (with Lee moving into the city to look for work and Marie moving out to the Coast), May blossomed. Her face cleared up and she had her buckteeth ground down. Without those pesky buckteeth troubling her, May was able speak clearer and not come off sounding like an unintelligent hick. Her sinuses cleared up and she no longer spoke in such labored, congested tone. Her body filled out and pretty soon May was real hot stuff. However, she was still pretty dim; nice but dim. And where do all brainless beauties aspire to be? In the big pictures, of course. And so like so many others, May ended up working at the Eros Club. She performed a bit but after a few years was awarded concubine status for one of the club's best patrons (a certain gentleman with quite a bit of juice in the state house, if you take the point). _Hell of a payoff for a lifetime of busting your ass,_ Eddy thought.

Not more than five minutes after walking into the club, Eddy felt a firm hand clasp his shoulder. Eddy turned to see Sampson, a great black Leviathan of a man who put fucking whales to shame. Sampson, the club bouncer, was about 6'9 and 300 pounds of muscle and aggression. He was completely clean shaven (hair, eyebrows, the works) and wore a monkey suit that clung to his bulging physique. "Evening Sampson. Guess your boss wants a word with me?" Eddy asked, attempting to appear calm and collected when he was in fact pissing himself in fear.

Sampson made no verbal response but simply nodded. He escorted Eddy past the stage and down the hall marked "Employees Only." After passing several cheap, spartan dressing rooms like Nazz's, the duo came to a door at the end of the hall with a presumptuous plaque that simply read "The Boss." Eddy looked back and saw Sampson's eyes on him, waiting for him to go in first. Eddy simply shook his head and sighed, irritated. _I know one thing: there had better be some fucking cigarettes in there,_ he thought before opening the door.


	8. Chapter 8: My Brother's Keeper

**Hey guys, long time no see. Just wanted to let you all know I haven't forgotten about this fic and I will be trying to publish more chapters this summer (fingers crossed). In addition, I wanted to announce that I actually plan on making a trilogy out of this, consisting of three separate stories that I'll be calling the ED Noir Trilogy: Noir/Blanc (Eddy's perspective), another currently untitled work (Edd's perspective) and ED Noir (Ed's perspective). I'll be starting work on those soon and I will definitely be needing a lot of help from you, my beloved readers. Be sure to comment if your interested. And lastly, I want to thank everyone for their continued support. So without further ado, Noir/Blanc…**

 **The Eros Club**

 **June 18th, 1951**

 **12:00 Am**

Eddy entered the manager's office at the Eros Club and almost immediately dropped dead on the spot. I wasn't because he walked into a hair of flying lead or taken a razor between his ribs but because of the smell of the office. No, its _stench_ **.** The office reeked of cigar smoke, cheap cologne, whore's perfume and alcohol. The room was lazily lit but Eddy had no trouble making out the figure of "the Boss" himself, sitting behind his fancy oak desk. After a moment, the figure spoke to him "You know Pipsqueak, you don't have to sneak into my club. You could just call me up. I am your brother after all…" he said condescendingly.

"Believe me Charlie, if I could avoid this fucking place, you wouldn't find me in a ten mile radius of this fucking joint" Eddy said with some bite. Charles Commodore McGee just sneered in response. He merely took another puff of his rank cigar and blew an "O" in Eddy's face, much to the amusement of himself and Sampson and to the displeasure of Eddy. _Fucking Charlie_ , he thought to himself.

Charles Commodore McGee was Eddy's only brother. He and Eddy had strained relationship to say the least. Eddy had worshipped his brother growing up, hung onto every word he said, and excused every abuse he dished out. Eventually though Eddy's parents had had enough of Charlie and he was kicked out of the house. He moved into the city and quickly fell into crime. At first it was merely small scams; a little pickpocketing here, a little dope-slinging there but eventually he got caught and wound up in jail for a bit. It was in lockup that he was approached Chief Detective Declan O'Rourke of the Vice Squad. America had just entered World War II and the city of Demeter's Bay was undergoing radical change. O'Rourke offered Charlie the deal of a lifetime: become the sole proprietor of the city's first police sanctioned brothel and O'Rourke's ear to the ground as it were. Charlie happily took the deal and since then has operated the Eros Club, restructuring and making the club into what it was today. Eddy had to give one thing to Charlie: when it came to running whores, Charlie was the Albert Einstein of brothels. He was an evil genius when it came to recruitment. It got young women of all kinds and backgrounds to come to the club with the promise of stardom. At first it was just nightly shows but then he would come to them with an offer: spend the night with this customer. Talk to him and tell him what he wants to hear. Let him buy you drinks and dinner. And if he wants to sleep with you, so what? You're getting paid, aren't you? Then after they got into the habit of doing that, they would begin accumulating debts and would have to work even more for much less if they ever hoped to pay it all off. Then maybe Charlie would come and offer them a little dope. "Just to take the edge off" he would say. Soon they would start to get hooked on the junk and eventually their debt would become insurmountable. From then on they were dope fiends who only got paid in hop. At that point they would be willing to do anything and everything for Charlie, gladly. And why not? He was the only sure way the could get their junk. And after Charlie had had them and used them off? They would thrown out, locked up, or maybe (if they proved troublesome enough) they would disappear altogether. Yes, Charlie had a neat little diabolical system. On top of that and the legit revenue from the club, Charlie could use the girls to settle debts, blackmail important men who used their services, and distribute photos and short smut films to make a tidy sum all on the side. And he did so all with the go-ahead of the DBPD and, if the rumors were to be believed, the "Plank" himself; the shadowy, perhaps fictious crime lord who ran most of the city's rackets.

At last, after waiting for Charlie to finish his cigar, Eddy spoke. "So why exactly, dear brother, have you had gorilla-boy here abduct me?" Eddy heard Sampson let out a low growl behind him and Eddy couldn't help better shiver a bit.

Charlie sneered and took a shot of something in a glass before answering. "I heard you came here last night while I was whisked away to the police station. Why? What's a crooked ex-cop care about some dead whore for?" he asked with a cool, belligerent tone. Eddy was tempted to leap across the table and knock his brother's teeth out but he figured that was a bad idea given the fact either King Kong would come up from behind him and pull his head of like a child's plaything or he would end up catching some lead from the heater Charlie was undoubtedly packing. So Eddy instead opted to just reach over Charlie's desk and steal a cigarette from his ajar cigarette case.

"Nazz was a friend of mine, asshole" he said right before lighting up his cigarette. "You did kill her, did you Charlie?" Charlie laughed loudly at this; his voice was full of mirth but his vicious green eyes were filled with malice.

"What kinda chump do you take me for, brother?" he asked haughtily. "You think I'd grease one of my girls like that? In my own business place?! Give me some credit, Pipsqueak. I'm a businessman. I operate solely on profit logistics" he said coldly.

"'Profit logistics'?" Eddy remarked "that's some fancy lingo you've picked up, Charlie. But what about the people you answer to? You don't wipe your ass with out the say so of O'Rourke and the Mob. So, what do they have to say about Nazz's death?"

Charlie was clearly annoyed now he still managed a sneer. "Perhaps you should ask them yourself. I'm sure they would _love_ to see you. This is the only warning I'm gonna give you brother: drop it. Nobody wants to hear about what happened to that girl. Just leave it be and I'm promise you'll be a lot better off. Got it?"

This time it was Eddy's turn to sneer. He leaned across the desk and got right in Charlie's face. "And you hear this, _brother_ : before this is over, I'm gonna bring this whole fucking thing down on top of your head and your masters' heads. Get me?" he asked through gritted teeth. He then reached across the desk suddenly as if to hit Charlie but instead simply took a second cigarette and extinguished the first. "Thanks for the smokes" he said before turning to go. As he was walking out he heard Charlie's voice. "Pipsqueak…I don't wanna have to attend your funeral."

With that, Eddy stopped for a moment at the door before steeping out. He worked his way through twisted pathway across the floor of the club and out to the parking lot where Lee was waiting for him. Without a word he motioned for her to get in the car. Silently, they drove out of the parking lot and got back onto the Antonucci Highway. At last, Lee had to ask him. "So what did your brother have to tell you? Anything useful?"

"No," Eddy replied, "just trouble."


End file.
